GIRL Dumps WoW Player for CS Player

Known to be the first of her kind, today an unnamed teenybopper broke up with WoW-playing teen-hearthrob Jason Whitecastle in order to pursue a relationship with CS state champion Marc Brill. Scientific studies have shown a correlation between boyfriend qualities and the dominant video games that they play. For males who spent an equal level of commitment on multiple games of different genres, the team of researchers were unable to find any effect on their lousiness as boyfriends.

Interestingly, when the unnamed girl made her decision, she had not read the research study conducted by the aforementioned scientists. The consensus from the video game research community is that males who play World of Warcraft rank lowest on the "quality boyfriend" scale, with Counter-Strike players ranking slightly above. Research on DotA players was not part of the project, as the managing professor is a fan and frequent player of DotA at the Brookville Lan Cafe in Brookville, Victoria. He told our Victoria correspondent Neil Anstrom that a quick game of DotA is his favourite way of winding down after a long week at Melbourne university.

Jason Whitecastle regrettably told us that from now on he will have to control the other half of his 40-man raid group, which was the job previously assigned to his now ex-girlfriend. In an interesting twist, it turned out that Whitecastle's girlfriend had been cheating on him the whole time with one of his guild officers from his Forsaken-only guild . The two men settled the dispute in true World of Warcraft fashion, in a duel to the death between the two players. Unfortunately, due to Blizzard's carebear dueling system, the loser did not die and was greeted with many boos in guild chat. It should be noted that Blizzard Entertainment received boos later that day from the entire video game community for designing the most expensive-to-play MMORPG of all time.

The new couple were spotted at a internet cafe in Brokentail Hill sometime this week, with sources later confirming it was just a random Counter-Strike player and his sister. LIER correspondent Neil Anstrom is yet to make contact with Marc Brill as his details are nowhere to be found in the phonebook. We spoke with Anstrom yesterday evening and he has remarked that he is becoming worried that "Marc Brill might not actually be a real person".